Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize