okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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