I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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