Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
this hospital has no fireball
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
