he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
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