I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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