he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
