2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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