is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
