It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I cut my penus on the lid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
All the doctor said was why
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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