Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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