White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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