worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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