Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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