Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
