I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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