sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
