Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
