We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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