I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
