i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize