I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize
