if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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