I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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