Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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