We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize