so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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