don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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