I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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