ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
