I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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