First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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