I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Randomize