Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
