I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize