One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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