she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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