I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
