It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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