I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize