Where are you?
In a non slutty way
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize