I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize
