it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
