no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
