His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I just forgot I was standing up.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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