My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I had to cum in my sink.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize