Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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