i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
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It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
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