Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
