I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize