Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
