ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
